wallflowers.

i just finished reading the perks of being a wallflower. it made me sad, and parts of it made me think. and parts of it i didn't like, and parts of it i really really liked. overall i'd say i liked it. it had some good quotes in it that stood out to me for different reasons:

"but because things change. and friends leave. and life doesnt stop for anybody."

"the halls seemed different. and the juniors were acting different because they are now seniors."

"when i was driving home, i just thought about the word "special"... i was very grateful to have heard it again. because i guess we all forget sometimes. and i think everyone is special in their own way. i really do. "

"the inside jokes werent jokes anymore. they had become stories. nobody brought up the bad names or the bad times. and nobody felt sad as long as we could postpone tomorrow with more nostalgia."

"i dont want to be somebodys crush. if somebody likes me, i want them to like the real me, not what they think i am. and i dont want them to carry it around inside. i want them to show me, so i can feel it too. i want them to be able to do whatever they want around me. and if they do something i dont like, i'll tell them. "

today i helped work the senior portraits at school. it made me feel really old, in a way, but then the other part of me felt like i wasn't old enough to be a senior, that i was just playing dress up again, smiling pretty for the camera. (not that i actually took mine today, but we did some posing anyway.) i don't feel old enough to be able to shoulder the responsibility of graduating and deciding my future and choosing a college. then again, i feel like i should already be fast fowarded to way past all the decision making and just be there, already.